If you've been browsing other pages in my Bookshelf, you're going to notice a theme -- sex. While I'm putting the books primarily about sex and sexuality on the appropriate page, you'll find that sexuality is a lesser theme, or an integral part, of many other books I collect. No discussion of relationships, for example, could fail to include at least some sexual component.

But here you will also find books about writing, history, art, spirituality. I'm not a huge fan of "self-help" books, but there are a few that merit inclusion here. Non-fiction is fun, because there's always so much to learn... I'm a font of useless trivia. But it's funny, because after awhile, as you read more and more, you begin to see how everything is interconnected. People are like that, too. I hope you enjoy these fascinating books! Share your thoughts and suggestions, and send me an email!
 

The Technology of Orgasm: "Hysteria," the Vibrator, and Women's Sexual Satisfaction
By Rachel P. Maines

I discovered this book while searching online for photos and a description of antique vibrators. I was curious how these devices came into being. I found a website run by "Mike," who has an extensive online vibrator and quack medical museum -- check it out here.

There is yet another virtual vibrator museum: The Good Vibrations sex-toy store, based in San Francisco, has an online antique vibrator museum, with brief information about vibrator history, accompanied by excellent photos from different eras. Click here to check it out!

On Mike's page, he made mention of Rachel Maines' Technology of Orgasm, and I couldn't resist buying the book. I thought I'd get a lighthearted, fun history of the vibrator, a relaxing fun read, suitable for the beach. But instead I got far more for my money. The book not only details the history of these vibratory stimulators the ladies love so much, but also told a more serious story, about how men, and the medical community in particular, turned female sexuality into a disease. The pathologizing of female sexual satisfaction continued officially well into the 1950s, and still exists to some extent today... in the form of an underlying subtext that is evident to me in my encounters with clients, and also with other women. Hell, this book was so damning of the medical community -- and yet fascinating in the way medicine evolved in a patriarchal culture -- that I ordered another copy of this book and had it shipped to my doctor. I thought she'd get a kick out of it. She already knows I'm her weirdest patient, anyhow.

To say this book is well-researched is putting it mildly. Rachel Maines is a university scholar first and foremost, so every detail of this book is not only highly accurate, but always accompanied by meticulous references and notes. I love that kind of thing; I mean, isn't that what we read non-fiction for? The facts mean everything.

I found this book utterly intriguing. I learned so much, and despite the intensive research, Maines approaches her topic with humor and a sense of fun. Vibrators were invented to combat "Hysteria," an imaginary illness afflicting women. The illness was their own natural sexual pleasure and drive, poorly understood, and disdained by those who did understand. The machines simply made doctors' lives easier (and brought much happiness to their patients!).

I do think, now that I have a better understanding of the history of the vibrator, that it's creation eventually liberated women from the medical diagnosis "Hysteria," and may have been a contributing factor in women's rights, and in the sexual revolutions of the 20s, 60s, and 80s. Oh, and I suppose I should mention that I had a personal interest in the topic, for two reasons: 1. I collect antique sexually related items, and 2. I really love vibrators. Now I'm ready to collect a few antiques!

The Myth of Monogamy: Fidelity and Infidelity in Animals and People
By David P. Barash, Ph.D. and Judith Eve Lipton, M.D.

I picked up The Myth of Monogamy while doing research for my Monogamy Rant, part of the Slut Rants. The book ended up becoming the linchpin of the essay, cited so often that I'm embarrassed -- I should have just referred people to the book. In the re-write, I intend to include more extensive sources, but that's another blog.

I found The Myth of Monogamy so intriguing, because it finally detailed scientific evidence for something I had long suspected: that monogamy is not a natural state, for people or animals, but simply a socio-cultural creation. Monogamy is just a choice we make (like going vegan, for example), using our amazing big brains and free will, following the norms of our culture. But genetically, biologically, it not only doesn't exist, it doesn't even make sense.

In the book, Barash and Lipton look at the behavior of animals primarily, but also draw connections to human behavior, as well. They present the most common theory, that the institution of monogamy began when human beings ceased a hunter-gatherer, nomadic lifestyle, and began cultivating land, staying in one place. Monogamy was simply a useful way of ensuring that a man's property would be passed on to his own family, his sons. In one fell swoop, monogamy and inheritance law came into being.

But because monogamy is a cultural construct, rather than a natural urge, I also think that monogamy also brought about the birth of prostitution. In this way, natural urges could be satisfied while still maintaining a "monogamous" relationship with one's spouse, as contradictory as that sounds. There is a difference between social, and genetic monogamy.

Prostitution exists in the animal world as well, as The Myth of Monogamy points out. Several species of birds show these behaviors, exchanging sex for something of value, in this case, food.

Further, and perhaps most importantly, the book demonstrates that animal species which are well-known to "mate for life" -- whales, swans, golden eagles, to name but a few -- don't actually mate for life. Perhaps only 10 percent, maybe less, of these famously monogamous animals really do take mates for their entire lives. Barash and Lipton demonstrate that with modern genetic and DNA tracking, it's become obvious that when the Daddy swan is away from the nest, the Mommy swan is getting busy with anyone who swims by -- while the Daddy swan pays housecalls to the neighborhood ladies. They may indeed spend their lives together, but they definitely fool around on the side.

While the book deals with animal and human behavior from a scientific perspective, it does so with a wonderful sense of humor, in easy to read, flowing prose. It's a fun read, and fascinating besides. As I've been saying for a long time, from a survival of the species standpoint, monogamy just doesn't make sense. It's hard-wired into our DNA to spread the seed, to create as much diversity in the gene pool as possible. Look at species of cats (like Persians) or dogs (like Cocker-Spaniels) that are so inbred that the brains and survival skills have been bred right out of them. Makes white supremacy seem even more dangerously idiotic than before, if that's possible.

Further, I personally tie all of this in to the notion of attraction, which I discuss in my Attraction Rant. The things that we perceive as attractive, or beautiful, are the things that nature tells us are examples of the best our species has to offer. Humans of mixed race, whether Asian and Caucasian, or African-American and Asian, etc.... these people are amazingly beautiful, physically speaking. Our DNA calls out to us, to share quality genetic material. And monogamy, and "purebreds," just don't fit with that utterly natural equation. Social monogamy, in our culture, makes some sense, as it takes quite a few years to raise children. But genetic monogamy is not present, in my opinion. And trying to force our bodies to follow our minds clearly isn't working that well. I know a great many happy polygynous people, but far fewer joyful monogamous folks.